The apology can be perceived as a sign of courtesy and thoughtfulness, so, when people are too apologetic, it may reflect further personality patterns. Chronic over-apologizing is not only a matter of courtesy, it can also be indicative of the qualities to do with self-image, sensitivity to feelings, and social awkwardness. Although context is important, according to the psychology studies, repeated and unwarranted apologetic behaviour may be the indicator of certain personality traits. These are the top ten characteristics that can be related to excessive apologizing.
High Agreeableness
Individuals who were found to have high agreeableness among the Big five personality traits were more likely to appreciate harmony and cooperation. They detest confronting and they tend to concern themselves a lot with the comfort of others rather than theirs. Another way of keeping peace is over-apologizing even in the instances where they are not in the wrong. As much as agreeableness leads to empathy and cooperation, it can overdo the apologizing aspect as a result of over-need to escape friction.
Low Self-Esteem
Such issues as low self-esteem are closely correlated with apologizing. Double timers can also assume that they are inconveniencing other people or that they are doing something wrong. Apologizing is a defensive mechanism to try to decrease perceived weight. In the long run, this habit may strengthen the sense of inadequacy and lower the level of assertiveness both at the personal and professional level.
Social Anxiety
Individuals having social anxiety fear unfavourable judgment. Over subconsciousness may serve as a defensive mechanism -the attempt to anticipate reproach or dismissal. Apologies may be caused even by small circumstances such as putting a question or opinion forward. Clinical psychology studies reveal that reassurance seeking behaviour (Over apologizing) is a common characteristic among individuals who have an increased social anxiety.
Perfectionism
Perfectionists have high standards that they set. As soon as they see the slightest errors, they can apologize repeatedly in a very short time. This is particularly widespread in subjects possessing maladaptive perfectionism where self-criticism ascends self-mercifulness. Being apologetic is a mechanism to deal with guilt and internal pressure as opposed to whether one is really wrong.
High Empathy
The very empathetic people are very sensitive. They can even apologize to the situations they cannot do anything about, just because they feel uncomfortable. As much as empathy enhances the bond between two people, excessive empathy causes blurring and resulting in unnecessary apologizing.
Fear of Conflict
Habitual apologizing can be motivated by the strong dislike of conflict. There are people that have been raised in a place where conflict creates tension or punishment. As adults, they can apply the use of apology to protect themselves out of a situation. This trend is not so much about guilt but emotional safety which is frequently based on the past.
People-Pleasing Tendencies
Approval and validation are important to people-pleasers. They can apologize to be able to stay likeable or acceptable. This character trait is similar to agreeableness only it is related more closely to external validation. Regular apologizing may demand genuineness and make it more difficult to clarify genuine demands or limits, in the long run.
High Conscientiousness
Conscientious people are extremely conscientious and detail oriented. They can quickly apologize about delays, errors or perceived inefficiencies, even minor ones. Although accountability has its benefits, over-apologetic behaviour may be an indication of high responsibility to deliver results, which are not in their power.
Trauma-Related Hypervigilance
Repeated apologizing in certain instances is an aspect of traumatic nature. Those individuals who have been in unstable or otherwise demanding environments can develop hypervigilance- which is being on the lookout all the time in search of danger. Giving an apology will be a survival tool so as not to conflict or be rejected. This is a behavior that mental health professionals may appear to be aware of during trauma-informed therapy.
Strong Moral Sensitivity
Certain individuals have a higher moral consciousness and they believe that they have a role to play in regard to fairness and justice. They can be very fast with their apologies in case they believe they are harming someone, even in the slightest way. Although moral sensitivity encourages moral conduct, excessive apologizing is a sign of incapabilities in the ability to hammer out between actual wrongs and human fallibilities.
